Monday, October 19, 2015

Last year...

So, I wrote this sometime last year. Found it in my unpublished drafts. I think it needs to be here...

School this year is hard. I don't want to talk much about it. I closed my education blog for a reason. But, suffice it to say, this year has been really, really hard. It's the sort of year where you question what you do. Even the TV is full of news about teachers being vilified.

Then this morning, as I am getting ready for the day, bracing myself, I hear over my intercom... "Mrs. H., there is a M. J. here to see you?" I ran out of the room. I left a colleague in the middle of a conversation.

See, M was a student of mine last year. She was a foster with a horrific story. But she was also the sweetest child, who skipped when walked, twinkled when she looked right at you, and had the deepest laugh. I loved her. She left right before spring break and it was heart breaking. But she was going to an adoptive family. She bawled in my arms that last day. She had been with her forsters for several years and did not want to leave them, or her school, her friends and me.

I ran down the hall, through the double doors and into the crowd of kids that line the halls before the bell rings. There was M, and she was running too. Arms out, she cried"Mrs. Hagy!' and threw herself at me. We had just minutes, she and her sister were back with their fosters, the adoption fell through, little sister was reenrolling at my school and foster dad was taking her to Junior High. She said she begged her foster dad if she could come see me and he said to hurry. She said she missed me.

I told her to be good and come see me. I told her to work hard. It was so good to see her. One more hug and off she flew and I remembered....

I remembered that if you touch one life, give one child hope, then it is all worth it. M keeps overcoming the tough stuff.

Fall of 2015... Finally!

I'm enjoying my last day of Fall break by doing laundry, organizing my desk, watching dogs sleep, and not feeling bad at all about going into work. My classroom can wait while I take back my life.

I've been sick nearly the entire month and I'm  still waiting for my voice to come back. Maybe it never will. Maybe I will sound a bit like Demi Moore for the rest of my life. Worse things have happened.

During the worst of this illness (two infections and several antibiotics) I came to a decision. I need a retreat; figuratively and literally. This is the second year that I was not able to attend Quartz Mountain Fall Art Institute and I feel the void. I am not sure how to fill it just yet, but I am working on it. 

Also, social media is unsatisfying and unrealistic for my life. I shaved down my Facebook "friend" list to mainly just old friends, true friends, and family. When I post, only I can see it so it becomes a timeline for me to look back on. 

I've decided blogging here is best for me. I doubt I'll blog again on my teacher page and will probably deactivate it. I won't try to generate traffic here, because I really don't care if anyone, except my family, reads it or not.
Fall is trying to nudge its way into Oklahoma, but we are still experiencing 80+ degree days. It's coming though, I feel it.